I am now friends with Chemistry.
I was going to do a long and detailed blog, but sleep seems awfully nice. ByeByeBloggie.

I had a great talk with my parents tonight. Great is a terrible adjective to describe it. I am so grateful to have my mum and dad to help me. When they were both gone I didn't know what to do with myself. I felt unable to deal, like a little kid.

That last post was a tad wee bit melodramatic. I was just caught in the worst moment, and that test was like giant thunder cloud over me. Yesterday I was walking through the blizzard and I realized that I really haven't been working nearly as hard as I could. For some reason I got so determined, and furious with myself, to actually do something about it. I am going to try, in earnest, to not have my computer on until I have finished all my homework. I take it back, I am not going to try. I am actually going to do it. Get some initiative and get over myself. I have had enough of my own bullshit. I am a smart kid and I will start doing better in school.
I am in an odd fuck-the-world mood, but at the same time quite optimistic, as conflicting as it sounds.

The song of my day/week/month is Titus Andronicus - Upon Viewing Bruegel's "Landscape With the Fall of Icarus"
The video for this song is great as well.

I cannot physically cope with school right now. I have never done this badly. I got my grades back for a Chemistry test. I got a 41.
I don't know what to do. I feel dumb.

There is this old reality T.V. show that films people frolicking in glass cubicles, with money showering down upon them. The contestants have crazed looks as they grab all the money. Today I am on of them, but instead of money raining on me, thousands of amsco cards are falling on my head.
Heartbreaker by MSTRKRFT

My mum is home! I didn't do anything today but go outside and take pictures of snow, which will appear on here in the coming week. It's hard not to like the first snow. Well, now that I think of it, I usually don't because it reminds me of all the following snowfalls. And five months of winter.

This was a tough week. Having to deal with life without parents around makes you feel like a little kid again, in the sense of being vulnerable, overwhelmed. That's not to say I didn't have fun being home alone for the week at times, but it was just a long time to be 'boss-man' of the house. The past few days have been marvelous. Seeing Emily in the nutcracker was enjoyable(and shout out: You were supaah). Ending the week on a strong note,feeling happy and laughing with friends, made everything seem easier. Then yesterday spending 24 hours at the morrel household was a party, as usual. Even if the kid cheats at wii sports. After that Emileaf came over for a much needed music/movie sesh. We watched Darjeeling Limited, and although it was extremely confusing and disconnected it was quite interesting, and beautifully shot.
Song: Dance the Way I Feel by Ou Est Le Swimming Pool.
Listen. I dare you.